It's probably no surprise this is currently my favorite commercial. Naturally, my version of this scenario would involve one of the characters shouting: "Like the good neighbor, the Marine Corps is there!" Then a Marine fire team would appear and direct accurate fire eliminating the threat.
An alternate ending would feature America's SgtMaj arriving on the scene to conduct a rectal exam on the villain with one of the chainsaws. Then drive away with the two ladies leaving the male characters behind to contemplate their utter failure as men.
However the scenario plays out, remember that in the really real world, there is no cure for stupid.
“Stupidity cannot be cured. Stupidity is the only universal capital crime; the sentence is death. There is no appeal, and execution is carried out automatically and without pity.”- Robert A. Heinlein
You kids have fun out there tonight.