Thursday, December 26, 2013

Christmas After Action Report

Though the loot was plentiful, our holiday was sadly zombie free this season. Of course, one has to be on guard against insidious creatures from the outer dark. Skulking at the edges of our sanity, these loathsome beings will take every opportunity to slither their way into our reality.

The Lord of R'yleh himself!
When confronted with the enemies of humanity, immediate action is required. In order to maintain your sanity in the face of Lovecraftian deities there is only one proven defense.
It helps the tentacles go down smooth.
Yes, Great Lakes Christmas Ale with cinnamon and brown sugar along the rim. It's a bulwark against the soulless cultists and other scuttling minions executing the foul intent of their dark masters this holiday season. 

We mere humans are not powerless against the enemies of mankind however. My lovely wife has adopted her family's tradition of Christmas Eve PJs as the first gift to be opened. In the case of America's SgtMaj, heroic action poses are the inevitable side effect.

My wife totally gets me.
Properly attired and buoyed by the beverage of their choice, heroes of every stripe continue to stand against the forces of evil.

Hoping you and yours had a very merry Christmas this season!

Semper Fidelis!
America's SgtMaj

9 comments:

Eric Stephens said...

Merry Christmas to you and yours and thank you for all you do to make us safe in our beds at night.
Semper Fi.

Anonymous said...

I can't help but notice that the evil minions have a squidgy (donno if that's an actual word, but my spell checker gizmo says it is, so I'm going with it) appearance?

Maybe the centuries of USMC vs USN in bars, taverns and other type drinking establishments has a deeper meaning?

Since you shared some of your Christmas fest traditions, I'll share one of ours.

This is an ancient rite practiced in our family since... well... fire was invented, I think, maybe.

We get prime rib (with the ribs attached) roasts enough so that all attendees of the ritual feast get a full slice, with bone attached. Each chunk of meat is grilled to personal wants/needs/desires.

Then we all sit outside, with our chairs in a circle, and gnaw on our ribs. Not a lot of talking takes place at this time, but there's noticeable amounts of grunting. Strangely enough, the women do most of it.

Then, after the meat is consumed, we all talk about the day/wee/year whatever. The good and the bad. Everyone keeps their rib bones and use them as conversation aids, like pointers, hand wave/gesture extenders, visual exclamation points, etc and so on.

After all that needs saying has been said, we break up into the usual party type personal maneuverings. The bones then become handy as prods to move bodies out of the way, head knockers to quiet those that forgot their inside voice, etc and so on.

After the party/feast/rite/ritual is over, everyone takes their rib bone home and nails it to a tree in the back yard.

This is to show any hostile spirits in the AO that, yeah, we eat good, and they can't have any of it. Makes em jealous.

Merry Christmas, one and all, each and every!!

And may everyone have a grand New Year.

-Grimmy

newmagoo said...

Merry Christmas! Hope you had a wonderful one.

America's SgtMaj. said...

Eric, hope yours was great too.

Grimmy, the evil minions in question are definitely Lovecraftian in nature. The Festival of Rib Bones seems like a family friendly event.

Magoo, thanks. Hope you got plenty of loot yourself.

Anonymous said...

Best wishes for a happy new year to you and all your readers. I'm skeptical of the contribution of sugar and cinnamon to otherwise decent ale, but you are stationed on a strange foreign shore. Best regards to the natives and their brewmeisters. I enjoyed many a pleasant meal at a neighbors - we would gnaw the ribs while a family of foxes gathered for the traditional bone toss. When our hunger was sated we threw the bones into the woods - happy foxes. I have a photo of two foxes waiting expectantly next to a smoking barbecue pit, tame as swab jockeys in a chow line. Have a great year.
Zail

Anonymous said...

"... the evil minions in question are definitely Lovecraftian in nature."

Well yeah. I got that part. But what struck me a bit sideways was just how squidish the Lovecraftian minions appear to be when they bother to manifest themselves.

Another item to consider. Ever hear of Lovecraftian monsters/minions/overlords going after naval vessels?
Nope.

I think I'm on to something.

PS. There's a good chance we'll see the Lovecratians manifesting in all sorts of nastiness as the RIF and associated budget battles go into full swing.

One Team, One Fight! My pimple covered tuckus. Not when there's budget dollars and end strength caps on the line.

-Grimmy

I'm just gonna use some of that old fashioned initiate and declare the USN to be minions of Lovecraftianism.

Bookworm said...

Glad to see that you and your lovely wife had fun this Christmas. It clearly bodes well for the new year.

Happy New Year to both of you, and to all your Castra Praetoria friends.

America's SgtMaj. said...

Zail, I was skeptical too until I gave it a shot. It is a tasty seasonal treat.

Grimmy, the denizens related to the Lovecraftian genre are many and varied, as well as particularly nasty. It would not surprise me if a prerequisite for public office included Dagon cult membership.

Book, thanks! That camp wishes you a great year too.

Anonymous said...

I shake your hand (being a civilian) for the Christmas ale and trimmings idea...they've been quite a hit around here.