Monday, April 28, 2014

Heard In The Clear!

I keep a small notebook handy to jot things down in the event I hear something clever or funny. Real life dialog is more entertaining than any sitcom.  My notebook is currently overflowing with one liners and quotes too good to be made up. Here are some samples for your enjoyment.

Military life lends itself to unique stresses. Sometimes we take it out on the wrong people:

"It's not my fault the Marine Corps hates you."

There are times when written evaluations are spot on:

"Said named officer has delusions of adequacy."

We often hear that we now live in the future. I'm not sure it's as high speed as everyone imagined it would be.

"Only in the Marine Corps does my military computer send .mil e-mails directly to the junk file."

 There are a number of societal issues the military has to deal with among its ranks. How to best approach dealing with them is the source of some debate:

"I find if we cut back on meetings the rate of suicide ideations tends to drop."

Concerning tattoo policy:

Her: "I dunno about this possible nanny. She has way too many tattoos."
Him: "When I was growing up my nanny had tattoos."
Her: "Really? Where?"
Him: "On her arm... where the Nazis put them."

One of the things I stress to my troops is their comportment in public. How we act off the battlefield says more about us than our actions in combat do. Remember, America is watching you:

"Dear Ranger, I saw that big sticker on your car as you cut me off by the college. Look, if you're going to try to drive bad-ass, please don't do it in a minivan."

First dates can be a bitch:

"She'll be here in two hours. Until then my nervous fidgeting will be audible to dogs."

Carry on with the plan of the day.

Semper Fidelis!
America's SgtMaj

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sgt Maj,

I would like to send the tattoo policy quote on to a friend or post it for Yom Hashoah today.
If okay with you?

Thanks.

jorgie





Anonymous said...

Glad you're back on the air Sergeant Major. Seemed like the whole internet was on the blink whilst you were laying about and watching daytime TV. - Zail

America's SgtMaj. said...

Jorgie, the quote is not mine per se so go for it. When I typed up the post I wasn't even thinking of Yom Hashoah.

Zail, there will be more on my whereabouts during my absence later.

Skyline Spirit said...

pretty nice blog, following :)